I read a book

Hi. I just finished a short book on long-distance grandparenting. It wasn't very good. Maybe a couple of ideas... One was to take each grandchild on a trip when they're about 10 years old or so. Just focus on that child. That's a nice idea. But I can't wait 7 years until Jack is 10...I need to keep in touch now! Another idea was to send hand-written letters they can treasure over the years. I like that, too. That's about it. Somebody needs to write a better book. It was from 2008 and had a tiny mention of webcams. Maybe the author wasn't too technological? I know webcams aren't the end-all-be-all, but with this opportunity for actually seeing each other there has to be creative ways to use it. Well...I hate to be critical of the book, but there has to be some of you out there with better ideas!
- Anne
P.S. Still haven't had the opportunity to do the webcam this week. Soon, I hope.

A phone is better than nothing

Hi. Boy...the roller coaster ride of this webcam until Matt and Jenny's internet is stable is not fun. We thought it was working yesterday right before Jake's nap, so I was going to read him the Firefighter book. But it went down. So I read it over the phone - it was okay, but definitely not the best. I was amazed at his attention span, though. He's only 3 1/2 years old. After that we talked a bit about his new friend, his backyard, riding his bike on the sidewalk, how rain and thunder are so cozy, and all the beautiful, small things that are important to a little guy. Then Jake said "I've got to go now. I'm kind of tired of talking on the phone." Don't you just love a child's honesty? Why can't we say that when we are tired of talking on the phone? We kind of do, but not that honestly. Lesson I learned today from Jake: Try to be honest. Have a wonderful Monday!
- Anne

Dang!

Hi there. Well...all set up and ready to spend a little time with the grandchildren on the webcam this Sunday morning. But...internet is down at their house again. They are just using the area wireless until theirs is set up on Wednesday. How disappointing! I was going to read a library book on Firefighters to Jake, and show a picture of a dog to Ellie in one of her favorite books. I also wanted to see Ellie walk holding onto one finger.

So we will simply talk to the kids in a couple of hours. Grrrrr.... Patience, Anne!
- Anne

Happy again

Hello. I'm feeling happy again. It's been almost two weeks since THE MOVE, and I know my life is good even without the grandchildren here in St. Louis. My world had been wrapped up with them for 3 years now, and I loved every minute of it. I wouldn't trade it for the world, would do it again in a heartbeat, wish they were still here and I was still babysitting! But...I always try to be positive about any situation. So...I have a little time for myself now. I don't get teary or sad too often...just lately when I'm talking about seeing them on the webcam. I get a little choked up about that, but my friends understand and are so supportive. Or I get a bit sad when I hear about my family or friends and their grandkids here in town. That's hard. I'm happy for them, but jealous at the same time. Do you understand those feelings?

Jim and I are planning a couple of trips - 1) to see Joe and Adrianne - yeah! 2) to my sister and brother-in-laws with my parents, and then on to see the grandkids (and Jenny and Matt). So...so much to look forward to. I just got off the phone with Jenny and they were out in the back yard. Jake had a friend from next door over playing. That makes me happy. Ellie is taking steps only holding onto one finger. (These are the things I do miss seeing!) Maybe the webcam will come into action here - what do you think? And again...thank goodness for that precious webcam.
- Anne

Jake and Elllie on a Webcam

Hi there. Matt and Jenny got the internet back up today, so we got to visit with Jake and Ellie on the webcam. It was so wonderful! We actually got to see them! Jake looked so cute in his little sleeveless t-shirt. He said "I miss you so much! I really do. I really want to play with you!" I told him maybe we could read a book this weekend...that I still had the firefighter book from the library that he loved. He liked that idea. Then Jake said "I got a new toy. I'll be right back...I have to go get it and show you." And he did. We gave hugs, blew a kiss and said good night. It was just so nice. (I did get a little emotional - I couldn't help it since it was the first time seeing them since they left.)

And then Ellie! She got excited when she saw Jim and me. She reached out and tried to touch us. She threw us a kiss. I played patty cake with her - that held her attention for a few minutes. Isn't it wonderful that she can see us and, therefore, remember us?!

This webcam is going to be wonderful. I recommend it for anyone with kids or grandkids out of town. And you don't have to be a technological genius, because Jim nor I are! Does anyone have other ideas for the webcam? You know, fun little things to do with your grandchildren? I need ideas! Thanks friends.

- Anne

The Old-Fashioned Way

Goog morning. I was thinking about modern technology and keeping in touch with my grandchildren. And then I had a thought. There's something to be said about the old-fashioned handwritten letter. Isn't there something that's really heart-warming about that? When was the last time you received a letter from someone? Wouldn't you like to? And if you did, didn't you think it was nice they took the time to actually write? I plan to do this. I'm not sure how much a 3 and 1 year-old will appreciate a letter, but maybe when they're a bit older they will. It can be something they tuck away and keep as a memory. I hope that's not wishful thinking! Does anyone else do this? Let's talk soon....

- Anne

Wecam Woes

Hello. We weren't able to use the webcam last eve with Jake and Ellie - their internet went down and no one can come out to fix it until next week. So...we did it the old fasioned way - phone. Jim and I got to talk to Jake for a little while. He told us about his new room where he can close his door so Ellie can't get to his toys. But he said sometimes he plays with her. He also explained that there's a lot of space and where we can sit when we come (I believe he was talking about the big porch swing). Then he said "I've got to go now." I said "Why do you have to go now, Jake?" And he replied "I've got to go play with my firetruck now." Ellie tolerated the phone for almost a minute!

I think the webcam will hold a 3 and 1-year-old's attention much better! I CAN'T WAIT!
- Anne

In love with a webcam

Hello! My son, Matt, and I played with the webcam last night and got it going. Jim wasn't home so he missed out on all the fun. Okay...this IS going to be fun. No..it's not like having our grandchildren here in person, but I think this will help us keep in touch and stay a part of each other's lives. Jake and Ellie were in bed already last night, but Matt gave me a tour of the house so I can actually visualize where they live. Now, I haven't seen Jake's or Ellie's bedrooms yet so maybe Jake can show me those. I think we're going to try to do this with the kids later today. I can't wait! I just hope I don't cry! So I'm trying to think about fun ways to do this webcam thing. I thought I could read a book to the kids...Jake has a favorite fire truck book I renewed from the library that he might enjoy. Or maybe we could eat a bowl of ice cream together? Does anyone have other suggestions? Thanks friends.
- Anne

Ideas from a friend

Hello. Dorothy, who is a long-distance grandmother, responded that it's important to talk weekly. Oh - I do agree! I hope to set up kind of a routine each weekend that Jake and Ellie look forward to, but not so strict with the time that it is a burdern. Flexibility's important, right? Has anyone found a favorite time or day that works or doesn't work so well? I know a co-worker who's kids had breakfast with her mom almost every morning. Her mom recently died and she treasures this memory!

One other piece of advice from Dorothy was to remember that Jim and I are different than the other grandparents. That's a wonderful thought. All four of us have unique things to offer these children in our very own way. Aren't they blessed to have so many people who love them! Thanks, Dorothy!

I have a friend, Diane, who has grandkids on the east and west cost - she's in the midwest. When I asked her how she stays close to her grandkids, she said "Don't let too long go by without seeing them." She and her husband make sure it's not more than 3 months between visits with either them coming here or vice versa. Expensive. I guess that's what we'll be saving for - frequent jaunts to Charlotte. But so worth it!
- Anne

It's sinking in, I think

Hello. I've been thinking about this...it seems surreal. Have they really moved? They've been out of town before for extended periods. Maybe they're not really gone? Is that it?

My life is seeming a bit emptier this week... I think it's starting to sink in that they have actually moved to Charlotte. Jake and Ellie now live by their other grandparents. In my kinder moments, I'm glad Jenny's parents will have the chance to get to know these two beautiful children for a couple of years like Jim and I have (it's a 2-year job and then they plan to move to Chicago). But then my ugly side - jealousy - creeps in and I'm just plain jealous of them. I can't help it...it's so hard. (I try to come back to the present moment like Eckhart Tolle tells me to do.) But at least Jake and Ellie have grandparents close by who love them. I talked to Jake for a few minutes the other evening and I couldn't help crying a little - but he didn't know it. He said "Do you miss me, grandma?" And I said "YES, Jake!". Do you miss me? And he said "Yes...I do! When are you coming to see me?" We already have a trip planned in late September! Hopefully, we'll get the precious webcam going this week.

Don't get me wrong...I've had a wonderful week. Two different times I met sister-in-laws at Bread Co.; spent the afternoon with my sister for my birthday; went to dinner at a beautiful outdoor restaurant with my sister, brother-in-law, niece, and hubby - it was a cool, pretty evening; dinner and a good movie with friends, and I'm blessed to work with co-workers I consider friends. Everyone has been so supportive of this hard time for me and I do appreciate it. So Jim and I are not sitting around moping. But there is something missing!!! Jim and I both know it - it's family.

It's odd..all our kids live out of town. And here we are. Hmmm.... This is not how I thought my life would turn out. We do head north to visit my son, Joe, and my future daughter-in-law, Adrianne, the end of this month. They live part-time in a tipi and we will stay several nights in a guest tipi (or maybe just a tent). So the adventures go on. I always say "The things you experience because of your children are amazing!" I'll be in touch.
- Anne

They're gone to Charlotte

Hi. It's been a busy time...I babysat 6 days straight while my son and daughter-in-law were in Chiago for the bar exam, packing the truck, etc. It was heaven, but also exhausting. Knowing they were leaving on 8/4, we tried to pack in as much fun as we could. The anticipation of them leaving was very difficult. My worst time was a couple of weeks ago...I had a bad week, and also the Sunday before they moved. My son was hooking up our webcam and it just hit me...my relationship is being reduced to a webcam?! But that's not how to think about it. This precious webcam will keep me involved in my grandkids lives, and make sure they know who I am! The evening before they moved, I was playing with Jake (Ellie was sleeping and grandpa and my son and daughter-in-law were still packing the truck). I got a little teary and Jake said "What's wrong, grandma?". I said "I'm a little sad that you're moving and I'm going to miss you." He wrapped up the entire "The Power of Now" book by Eckhart Tolle (I love this book!) in one sentence..."But I'm not moving NOW, grandma. So let's play!" The moral...stay in the present moment. Children know this, we have to read and study an entire book to re-learn this. They are a gift of simplicity.
See you soon,
- Anne
P.S. Big truck and car with grandkids arrived safely in Charlotte. My prayers were answered. It doesn't seem real that they are gone, though.

3 days to go

Hello,
It's been a while. I haven't had the heart to write. Plus I've been blessed to have my grandchildren quite a bit lately! How lucky for me! I have a new plan...have them constantly until THE MOVE (3 days from now) and I'll be ready to send them off! Ha! Not so. I don't think that will help. But I am enjoying so much being with them. Savoring every last experience, word, smile from them. I now only get sad about seven times a day...then I pull myself together. The kids spent the night last week. I got teary at one point thinking about them moving, and Jake said "what's wrong with your face, grandma?". So funny! I think I'm almost out of tears, but then more come. I really pray that a peacefulness comes over me so I can say goodbye without being too emotional for Jake's benefit. And I have to go to work...my face swells if I cry too much. This is not good. "Come back to the present moment." That's what I keep telling myself and trying to do. It works most of the time.
- Anne